What is
Holding Space?
To hold space is to be present, compassionate, and supportive of someone without trying to fix or change them or their circumstances.
Holding Space is a practice that equips you to be with uncertainty and uncomfortable conversations. It gives you tools to navigate change, conflicts, and other challenges in relationships and community. It’s a holistic practice that goes beyond the care of others, inviting you to deepen your capacity for self-reflection, self-regulation and personal growth.
“Holding Space is what we do when we walk alongside a person or group on a journey through liminal space. We do this without making them feel inadequate, without trying to fix them, and without trying to impact the outcome. We open our hearts, offer unconditional support, and let go of judgement and control.”
– Heather Plett, The Art of Holding Space: A Practice of Love, Liberation and Leadership
Like a robin gathering bits for her nest, to make it both strong enough and soft enough to hold space for the hatching of her fragile eggs, we create a container to hold space for the healing, growth, and flourishing of those we care about. The nest contains without controlling, it supports without judging.
In Heather’s book, The Art of Holding Space, she talks about how holding space is like “being the bowl” (or “being the nest”) for other people. In order to do that, we must also learn to hold space for ourselves.
At the heart of holding space is a willingness to sit with ambiguity, loss, struggle, darkness, uncertainty, joy, anger, fear, anticipation — all of the complexity of what it means to be human in an ever-changing world. It’s about having the courage to peer into shadows, while not getting in the way of the light.
It’s about letting go of dualism and sitting in the place in between.
When we practice holding space, we develop capacity for navigating liminality.
A liminal space is a threshold – the space of ambiguity or disorientation that occurs when we find ourselves between stories, polarities, beliefs, or identities.
A Bowl with Three Layers
When we learn the practice of Holding Space, we activate the three layers of the bowl – the inner layer (what we offer), the middle layer (what guides us) and the outer layer (what supports us).
The Inner Layer – What we offer
The inner layer of the bowl is what we offer to other people when we hold space. The qualities of the inner layer are: witness, containment, compassion, selective non-judgement, selective guidance, space for complexity, autonomy, flexibility, connection, and allyship.
The Middle Layer – What guides us
The middle layer of the bowl is what guides us when we hold space. Our guidance system consists of: intuition, discernment, humility, courage, and curiosity.
The Outer Layer – What Supports us
The outer layer of the bowl is what supports us when we hold space. The two interdependent components of the outer layer are: mystery and community.
For more on the bowl, as well as the “psychic membrane” (how we hold space for ourselves), read Heather’s book The Art of Holding Space and join us for the How to Hold Space Foundation Program.
We believe that Holding Space is a practice that can strengthen and deepen ALL RELATIONSHIPS. Our programs support people in all walks of life and in all kinds of relationships. Whether you work in a caregiving field, where you hold space for people professionally (pastoral care, hospice work, teaching, coaching, facilitation, midwifery, therapy, childcare, etc.) or you simply want to improve your capacity for holding space for your family and friends, we have something to offer.
Learn more about holding space
How to Hold Space Foundation Program
Holding Space Practitioner Certificate Program
The Art of Holding Space
52 Weeks of Holding Space
